Mayonnaise Apocalypse

So in the efforts of moving my household from things like corn syrup and GMO foods to more natural foods, one of the things that had to change was mayonnaise. It is full of corn syrup and soybean oil and a variety of things that were unrecognizable. So I decided it was time to make our own. Last night we located an “easy” recipe and went to bed with the intention of making home made mayo today. I mean, how hard could it be?

This morning we got together in the kitchen, we had the ingredients, the determination and figured we would have a few jars of it made up before noon.


It isn’t that easy. The oil has to be drizzled in at just the right speed or things won’t emulsify, picky stuff. And then, even when it does, it can suddenly break on you at any time leaving you with a separated, greasy, mess.  Stupid temperamental emulsification process.

Yep, that was what happened to us, over and over.

What was only supposed to take up about an hour of our morning turned into an all day endeavor that involved a lot of frustration and a lot of laughing. After all, if you don’t find humor in your failure then everything seems worse.

It took forever, but finally, we did end up with home made, olive oil mayo. The recipe will need some minor tweaks to adjust it to what we want flavor-wise. Like a little less lemon juice, less pepper, etc. But in the end, we did conquer stupid home made mayo. Which isn’t quite so stupid once you get the hang of it.

Oh and, *sticks tongue out at all of those people with their tube videos that make it look so easy.*

14 thoughts on “Mayonnaise Apocalypse

  1. I use an immersion blender and I’ve never had any trouble. Using a food processor gave me a headache because it just wouldn’t turn out right. If you have a stick blender try it next time.


  2. Sounds like you had as much run making that as we did with homemade sushi – of course it would have helped if we actually had bought a sushi making kit or rolling mat. We had rice everywhere, they were slightly deformed but it was tasty! Cheers to you on making your own 😀


  3. I made it once long ago, but most likely used a whisk. I don’t remember having any problem with it, but surrendered to the easier way unfortunately. You’ve inspired me to try it again. . .almost.


  4. A good friend at work is “paleo” which is a new term to me. She is affectionately called the “Almond Flour” mom, and we laugh whenever she brings us some homemade fruit loop type cereal. Not horrible, but not as good as the sugary stuff either. However, her child labeled with ADD has started acting dramatically different (in a good way) and her migraines went away. We no longer laugh. We take notes.


    • Yep, I used to think that organic and worries over GMO’s etc were silly. Over the past few years though, things have change for me. We have our own chickens for our own eggs. Until six months ago we had dairy goats for our own fresh milk and now that we have secured a source of hay, the dairy goats will be returning at the end of March. We are also raising and butchering our own meat chickens. We raise most of our own vegetables. When we can get moved to a larger place, we plan on raising our own pig and beef cow as well. We make a lot of our own bread, our own jelly, etc. We rarely eat out anywhere.

      And yes, taste and texture is different. But after a while you become so used to it that the stuff you once thought was the best now tastes nasty.


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